Dear Roommate, I Am Sorry About

  1. Laughing so loudly at Snapchat when you are not yet awake
  2. Piling my blankets up in a big old pile right next to the couch
  3. Making soups which result in many difficult-to-clean dishes
  4. Owning a dog whose shedding creates enough loose fur to weave a small blanket (later added to Blanket Mountain)
  5. Refusing to put away the old food and water bowl on the front porch because MY CAT RAN AWAY AND ITS TOO PAINFUL TO THINK ABOUT
  6. Dog fur. All over the floor. Always.
  7. Not putting a trash bag in the trash can bc it's my trash can and why would you need that it's more difficult and costs more money ok this isn't really an apology