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  1. If I am about to fall off something really tall, or into something really dangerous
  2. Grab my arm or the back of my shirt or something
  3. And then let me go as soon as I am safe
  4. That's all.
I'm not a cat person, in fact I have joked about killing cats in the past but then this happened and showed me that deep down I have a heart
  1. I went to my mom's house to do laundry last night
    Driving up the hill every time I have to move a load isn't my favorite but it's helping since we spent a bunch of our savings to move and we aren't quite ready to buy a washer and dryer yet
  2. There was a gray cat hanging around outside
    I told it to go away
  3. I opened the garage door to take my laundry inside and the dang cat went right into the garage
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Listen- if you tell me to do Whole30 or something to get over my sugar addiction, imma cut you. I've never had alcohol, smoked anything, and caffeine is the only drug I occasionally abuse
  1. Sugar cereal
    Sometimes great, sometimes (as at the time of writing where I am sadly eating Frosted Mini Wheats) sometimes not really enough sugar to be worth it
  2. Dried fruit
    Very disappointing
  3. Chocolate chips meant for baking
    Sorry mom
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I am a horrible ogre
  1. Plain white onesies, assorted sizes
    In the softest material you can find
  2. Gift Cards
    So I can pick out my own shiz for my baby. I hate most baby stuff
  3. Nothing else
    Like I said, I am a horrible ogre 🙈
Harder than it looks
  1. Faye from "That Thing You Do"
    Although all my great monologues usually stay inside my head instead of said to the person they are meant for
  2. Anne Shirley
    My mother got the hair though
  3. Minerva McGonagall
    Just give me time
Should I cry about it?
  1. Do I have to pee?
    Or is it just pressure from Baby Girl that will go away when she changes position?
  2. Am I hungry?
    Or just accustomed to eating very frequently?
  3. Do I want her to kick me?
    Or is it nice to have a momentary break from the overstimulation that comes when there is chaos inside and outside?
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  1. Brink!
    A little before my heyday, but I'm pretty sure I saw it
  2. Halloweentown
    I get all the Halloweentown movies mixed up, but they are solid entertainment for the month of October
  3. Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century
    Now we're getting into familiar territory! Loved it. So quotable. So many hairstyles to try in your bathroom and then NEVER wear in public because other kids are judgemental little turds.
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Holy Frick, we need a bigger bed!!!!
  1. We rent a furnished room with a Full-sized bed
  2. Husband is 6'4" and sturdy
  3. I'm 5'8" and PREGNANT
    I'm super excitescared to be a mom but pretty much since the moment I got pregnant my skin has been very sensitive: itchy and uncomfortable. Plus, I'm not going to be getting smaller any time soon (still in my first trimester)
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