STRANGERS WHO HAVE GIVEN ME UNSOLICITED RELATIONSHIP ADVICE

Because being a woman automatically means I need a man!
  1. The lady at the nail salon
    I'm sure this has happened to many of women but there's something irritating about hearing the words "good luck find boyfriend!" Every time I leave the nail salon. How about "your cuticles look much better this time!" Or "how's work?" Just a thought.
  2. A homeless man on Main Street in Santa Monica
    He approached as I was minding my own business, getting a green juice and being a total cliche when he told me "you're too cute for your own good" not not true. And then he said "you need to find yourself a man, or do something with your looks to make money" Ima use my brain, thanks tho.
  3. My dentist
    I was home in San Diego one summer during college when I decided to try a new dentist. I was maybe 19 years old. The dentist was normal at first, slightly shocked though that "a beautiful girl like me wouldn't have a boyfriend" I tried to ignore her attempt at a compliment until we got to the teeth cleaning portion. When she realized the adult tray wouldn't fit in my mouth she said "your mouth is so tiny! That's why you don't have a boyfriend!"
  4. My uber driver at 2 am
    As my uber driver drove me along the 405 to not my boyfriends apartment my uber driver became fixated on me not being in a relationship. He had so many questions and suggestions. Eventually be decided that I just needed to date a black man bc I'm a "petite little thing" and a black man would "treat me right."
  5. My grandma
    No she is not a stranger but she has no problem bringing up my relationship status at every famous function and most recent asked me (in front of my entire family at a Christmas dinner) "so Suquoia, do you like boys or are you into girls?" Just a slut grandma, just a slut.