Stuff I Say When I Find Myself Watching the Bachelor

  1. "This isn't sanitary."
  2. "How wasted IS that girl?! She can't form a sentence!"
  3. "Statistically, a handful of those girls are hooking up."
  4. "I will never learn their names."
  5. "I'd be the whiskey drunk girl in the corner, judging"
  6. "Is she eating his face?!"