IF LAMBY ANTONOFF DUNHAM COULD TALK

Thank you @mianguyen for asking me to do what I am doing in my head all the time.
  1. "GOOD MORNING LOSERS!!!"
  2. "You know what they say, bromigos! 3 walks a day keeps the doctor away!"
  3. "It's those Goddamned bulldogs again, thinking they own the fuckin' elevator. Well, they're New Englanders and I grew up in CROOKLYN BABY THESE STREETS BIRTHED ME."
  4. "It's so gross when Lena refers to me as her 'mommy wommy momela.' I already have a mom, bitch! But I don't remember her😢"
  5. "Meat is where it's at but I'll for sure fuck with cantaloupe."
  6. "Do me a favor, Lena? Run the shower again so I can lap at it fiendishly?"
  7. "All these paparazzi at LAX actin' like they've never seen a terrier poodle mix before."
  8. "I'm working on a screenplay about a bunch of shelter dogs with a get rich quick scheme. Some guys at William Morris Endeavor are hip pocketing me."
  9. "I don't talk to the press about my sexuality, but let's just say I have nothing to hide."
  10. "It's important to have time to suckle your own inner thigh for awhile before bed."
  11. "I love my grandma and she loves Moschino."
  12. "I know you say all dogs can't have chocolate but I'm not all dogs."
  13. "GOODNIGHT! And don't let the bed bugs bite! By the way, sorry I brought fleas in on my single blonde dread."