IMPORTANT ASPECTS OF OBERLIN COLLEGE BETWEEN 2005-2008

Some of the best things about this liberal arts haven in the mid oughts. Remember @videodrew?
  1. Coke free campus!
    The soda. For labor politics reasons (!?) coke was not permitted on campus and so Pepsi was a big deal.
  2. Safe spaces were everywhere: women only, vegans only, Jews only, the works. Outsiders could enter but only with explicit permission/respectful attitudes.
    Once I went to visit this cool dog-collar wearing lesbian named Delicious in the women's only house and she had a huge leather couch and a play station and it looked like an 80s coke den/did not feel at all like a safe space.
  3. Every day there was a walk out. I never fucking knew what I was walking out for.
    Walk out because Oberlin serves Nabisco! Walk out because our teachers breathe without asking for permission! Walk out because missionaries visited our town in 1610!
  4. The Experimental College (aka ExCo) allowed students to create syllabi and teach classes.
    Hence the opportunity to fuck the teacher of a Deadwood class.
  5. The college president was in my jazzercise class.
    The only male. It DID feel like a safe space.
  6. Students could get funding for varied upstart projects
    This explains: the bike derby (involved fire and meat) the Journal of Proper Thought (a short lived long form journalism magazine run by senior boys in heinous Terry Richardson glasses) my roommate Willie's indoor skate ramp (his senior thesis)
  7. Contact improv was huge
    This is a form of "dance" that, to the outside observer, looks at best like an orgy and at worst like sexual abuse. The "contact jams" were run by a tiny man we called French Jeremy (though he called himself Zebulon.) I was kicked out when he realized I was a mole planted by the school paper.
  8. For a school so obsessed with safe sex, condoms were NOT all the rage
    Condoms were more readily available than organic food and yet there we were, tracing the HPV across East Hall.
  9. A lot of people moved to Oberlin to work on sustainable fuels
    They smelled of the French fry oil they were using to power their VW vans but they were exotic. Like, came to Ohio all the way from Buffalo exotic.
  10. Many of us lived in Victorian mansions
    I didn't realize I would never have a more Bronte sister sexual moment. Miss you, college (sort of.)
  11. Oh and one more thing:
    Oberlin was the first college to admit both African American and female students. It is a very special place with a history of recognizing injustice and taking steps against it. But one time this hippie told me Harriet Tubman was buried under the quad, and even when I Googled to disprove he was like "NOPE SHE IS."