INSTAGRAMS THAT MAKE ME WONDER IF I'M DOING LIFE WRONG

Well, thank you for asking @bjnovak. This is gonna be hard considering it's most instagrams but here are some PRIME passions/offenderz.
  1. Chiara Ferragni
    Hey, Chiara, I hope you're enjoying jetting around exposing your perfect navel and showcasing your footwear designs while I struggle to assert my authority and fight my endometriosis flare up of the year ❤️
  2. Melissa Ford aka MDollas11
    Rihanna's ride or die is smoking weed in bed like it's a career but also a calling, and she shows just the right amount of thigh in the process. Meanwhile I took a klonopin and all it's done is make me miss my grandma who has been dead for 15 years.
  3. Tess Holliday
    Not only is she taking over the world and rescuing us from body shaming goblins, she actually seems to be enjoying herself in the process. Like really I don't see her breaking down into tears every time she enters a hotel room.
  4. Alexa Chung
    Oh go design more denim you perfect doll and wear a twin set to Coachella, defying all logic and probably starting a cult.
  5. Cat Marnell
    Let me into the shower with you, you beautiful disaster. If I led your lifestyle for one day I would get late stage emphysema and that's just a fact and if I smeared my lipstick I would be taken in for questioning. You look fucking great on pills.
  6. Reese Witherspoon
    Your dog is on a raft. My dog is on anti-psychotic medication so he won't self harm.
  7. Candice Huffine
    I only ever get naked if I know it's gonna gross someone out in a funny way. You are a beautiful island queen.
  8. My friend Jane aka oodlesofpain
    Just a leisurely afternoon trying on some latex garments (for contrast, I gave my father a "talking to" then napped.)