I don't have plans to write this book, but I do have a shitload of titles I never expected to be able to call my own
  1. I'm Worried I've Upset Kathy Griffin: My Life As A Lady Whisperer
  2. We Met Through Selena Gomez: How A Glowworm Got Her Groove Back
  3. Benzos & Babyfood: My First Year As A Professional Chubster
  4. They Won't Give Me Ariana Grande's Direct Number: Essays & Thangs
  5. Stop Stealing My Bits: The Case of the Missing Nipple Covers
  6. P Diddy Says Hi: The Best July of my Life
  7. Glenn Close Loosened My Corset and Other Unexpectedly Sensuous Experiences
  8. Just Follow Bryan Cranston: My Dad, My Date, My Duty
  9. I'm Prettier In Person and Other Lessons From Strangers
  10. Penny Wise and Power Mad