THINGS THAT ARE AWESOME ABOUT HAVING A UTI IN JAPAN

You guys, I don't wanna brag but this is my third international UTI. So when that tell tale burning started I didn't know what my future held. @jennikonner's AZO just wasn't proving a match for this bitch. Turns out, Japan is THE place for a UTI. Shout out to my friend Hiro for taking me to the Sendagaya International clinic!
  1. For starters, the doctor runs on time.
    Like, very on time.
  2. They have a tiny cabinet specifically for urine samples.
    Seriously, it is the exact right size for ONE urine sample but saves you the pain of leaving a half cup of piss on a counter. I wish you all could experience peeling in a cup and locking it away. It feels like a cool thing an alternative shrink would suggest.
  3. Dr. Tadashi Shinozuka was kind but speedy.
    Exactly what you want when your urethra feels like it is being stabbed by tiny knives. He laughed at one joke and one joke only (the part where I said "sorry to make you deal with my vagina on a Friday night." I'm gonna assume Hiro translated that accurately.)
  4. He suggested "much green tea" which is basically like telling me to shop til I drop as a cure.
    I love green tea.
  5. The drugs are IN the office!
    No pharmacy. No sad, wet journey across town with a crumpled slip of paper and a grimace. They are presented in clearly marked envelopes for your immediate consumption.
  6. They give you probiotics along with your antibiotics!
    East meets West! They recognize probiotics are not just a suggestion but a necessity!
  7. It all came in a crisp white shopping bag.
    Chic as fuck.
  8. Oh hey national healthcare 🍣🍜🍱🍲🍙💊💉🔑