Thursday night, 9PM, busy shoppers bustling around Fred Meyer trying to finish their purchases, when over the loudspeaker rings out: “Message to (unintelligible name): I fucking quit!"
  1. 😮
  2. Dead silence for around 5 seconds, and then people start peeking around the end of the aisle to be like "OMG!!!" and "Did that just happen?" and "That was awesome!"
  3. After a few minutes, a compelling thought occurs to me: the rogue employee must still be in the store somewhere. I am tempted to buy a bag of popcorn and a lawn chair and park it by the exit to watch this scene unfold.
  4. 10 minutes later and everyone's still pushing their carts around exchanging meaningful glances, as if to say "DID YOU HEAR THAT???"
  5. Also everything else is crazy here too? I swear it isn't just me.
  6. I saw a guy blatantly ripping open packages of Nicorette and standing there chewing it like a wild animal and looking menacingly around like "You saw nothing." I avoid eye contact and roll on by.
  7. Weird night at the store.
  8. I love the specific phenomena that occurs when something bizarre happens in a mundane situation and strangers are forced to acknowledge it and share a bond over the break from the routine.