Requested by Lisa

First time voting: My experience

Sorry @Lisa_Fav I tweaked the request a little bit so I'd have more to write about.
  1. I started writing this draft before the election results.
    Then after the results, I had to delete everything I'd written, which was two or three words. My perspective had completely changed and I just couldn't write the same list anymore.
  2. Let me start by saying that I am shocked.
    The results of this election shocked me. I really didn't think Trump would win. And he did. It still doesn't feel real to me.
  3. I've never been a fan of politics.
    I didn't grow up wanting to be the President because I knew it was a stressful job and you had to tell a bunch of lies to get elected by the time I was like 7. I took government when I was 15, and I told myself that I wouldn't vote because it made no difference. Clearly, I've changed a lot in four years.
  4. This election season has been so confusing for me.
    I've changed my mind multiple times and I still don't know where I stand. However, the one constant has been my dislike for Trump. I have never supported him, never thought that he would be a good president, and never even considered that we would elect him.
  5. For the last 9 months, I've been struggling with my political party, my stances, being open minded to other opinions, and thinking that the government is a mess and I should just become a hippy and live in a treehouse somewhere, swearing off the government.
  6. However, by the end of the summer, I had resolved that I would vote for Hillary, and made peace with that decision.
    I couldn't fathom voting for Trump, and I knew that I had to stop him.
  7. Throughout September, Donald Trump continued to convince me that he was a lunatic and in no way shape or form would I ever vote for him.
  8. In mid-October, I got my absentee ballot and filled it out.
  9. It was a proud and overwhelming moment. For some reason I thought I would regret voting for Hillary, but I didn't.
    I'd vote for her again tomorrow.
  10. This whole time, I had been confident that Hillary would win.
    I believed that people were good, and I believed that we wouldn't allow a man like Donald Trump to become President.
  11. I mailed my absentee ballot (with actual stamps, wtf) and was confident that we would soon have a woman president.
  12. Tuesday was an exciting day for me. I was done with class in the morning and was ready to watch history.
    I thought about how amazing it would be that my kids would never know a time when women weren't presidents.
  13. Unfortunately, we didn't get our woman president.
  14. I stayed up until 2am watching the results, finally went to sleep knowing that Donald would be announced as the new president when I woke up, slept through my stats class that morning, and woke up around 10:30am.
  15. I texted with Talor, my sister, and my best friend from high school.
    I felt incredibly hollow and numb, and the rest of the day was a blur.
  16. I now wish I had done more. I wish had stood up for those who needed me to stand up for them.
    I'll never make that mistake again.
  17. I'm really struggling with what I believe in, what's right, and what's wrong.
    I'm a believer. I believe people when they tell me something, and I don't know what to believe anymore.
  18. I still believe that there are more good people than bad people in the world.
    I'll never stop believing that. It can be hard to remember, because bad people get more attention than good people do, but the good ones are still there.
  19. I'm scared. I'm scared for the future, for the uncertainty, and for the world that Trump has created.
  20. However, I'm praying that Trump proves me wrong.
    I've never wanted to be proven wrong more than I do right now. I am hoping that Donald Trump steps up and surprises us all.