THINGS VLADIMIR KRIMSKY COMMANDED ME TO DO TODAY ON THE FARM

When I first moved to LA, I sniffed out the closest farm—a sprawling acreage on Hollywood Blvd btw Gardner & Curson, tended to by elderly Russian folks and overseen by Master Head Gardner Toby Leaman.
  1. 1.
    "Get positive energy from eucalyptus tree."
    Vladimir is Toby's second in command—she's a real hard-hitting 77 y o broad that takes no bs. But she did do as Vladimir told, and hugged the tree. She then informed me the tree is about 115 years old. I hugged it, too.
  2. 2.
    "Move wheelbarrows."
    From the wood chip pile to where the compost used to be. Because farm reorg.
  3. 3.
    "Get svetty and you no have to go to gym!"
    This comment delivered as he supervised my transport of a giant barrel of tools into his desired repair station locale.
  4. 4.
    "Don't tell anyone about leaves! So we can use."
    Upon discovering the kaffir lime tree we have in the herb garden annex.
  5. 5.
    "You and I, we think on same direction."
    Do we, Vladimir, do we?