WHAT I LEARNED IN COUPLES THERAPY

  1. couples therapy isn't meant to end fights, but to better equip you to fight fair.
  2. licensed clinical social workers charge just as much as psychologists.
  3. couples therapy can bond you.
    subject of our sessions aside, my boyfriend and i loved our therapist. at dinner on our third anniversary i said, "don't you kind of wish sara was here with us?"
  4. "i know, i'm sorry" will end any argument.
    just don't follow it with a "but"
  5. arguing about whether or not you're going to send your future kids to catholic school is a waste of your $100/hour.
  6. there is nothing like a good cry every thursday at 8am before work.
    i'm estimating 30% of what we paid for therapy went toward tissues.
  7. almost more than finding a resolution, i wanted our therapist on my side.
    and she was, which was satisfying. though it would have been more satisfying if my boyfriend heard my needs when i asked the first time, not just when it was 2 to 1.
  8. empathy is the key to all relationships.
  9. couples therapy can't save everyone.
    especially not when one of you is an untrustworthy, overly-critical bully who projects all his irrational insecurities onto the person closest to him.