PLEASE DON'T ASK ME:

  1. If I think your baby/dog/boyfriend/girlfriend is cute.
    If I didn't say it, I don't think it. I might even think it/he/she is hideous. You don't want to hear that.
  2. What I think of your hair/outfit/shoes/makeup.
    Odds are I don't like it, or think it's unflattering. Please don't make me say this. We have different tastes, and if you like it, wear it, even though it makes you look like a tractor trailer hauling manure ran you over on the 405. Repeatedly.
  3. For life advice.
    I'm a 29 year old single woman with a barely functional car, and tons of debt living in a studio apartment, and working as a temp. I am not qualified to give: relationship, job, education, or housing advice. Don't ask me this stuff. I clearly don't know!
  4. If I want fries with that.
    OF FUCKING COURSE I DO, IDIOT!