REASONS WHY OFFICE JOBS ARE THE WORST

I forgot how rough these are
  1. No one looks good under fluorescent lights
    Everyone becomes a translucent human-shaped blob with acne scars and stubble
  2. Sitting at a desk is tiring
    Probably because it's freakin' boring
  3. Office politics are reminiscent of high school but with people who are parents/grandparents/old enough that they should be slightly mature: THEY'RE THE WORST
    The clicks, the hierarchy, the gossip
  4. It's impossible to poop in the office's restroom
    Too much foot traffic, no privacy, and everyone will know it was you if you destroy even just one of the stalls with your post-lunch funk
  5. Wearing pants
    But what if I wanna stay in pajamas all day?
    Suggested by   @rebeccaroanoke
  6. No mid afternoon naps!
    I've been working from home for two years and just got a job in a real office. How do you people not zonk out an hour after lunch?!
    Suggested by   @rebeccaroanoke