THINGS I THOUGHT I'D HAVE BY THIS AGE
At 19 I moved out of my parent's home into a studio apartment. I worked 2 part-time jobs, and went to college full-time (because sleep is for suckers and I had a timeline I needed maintain). I made a list of what I wanted to have within the next 10 years (this was before vision boards and pinterest). I'm turning 29 next month. I have none of these.
- •A houseHahahaha poor, naive 19 year old me! I live in a studio apartment. 10 years later and my apartment isn't even bigger than the one I had when I made this list. In fact, I think it's smaller, and it's definitely more expensive, but that's what happens when you live in Los Angeles.
- •A cool job writing for a magazineI don't know what I was thinking. Even at 19 I knew print was dying, after all one of my jobs was at a struggling magazine that had regular layoffs, which is how I got the job: I was cheap labor (it is apparently somehow still alive though. Hey Hartford Magazine, how are you?). Alas, I'm not employed as any sort of writer. But I do work in TV production, and my job can be pretty cool sometimes (as a bonus: it seems to impresses people who don't work in it: if they only knew! Ha)
- •The ability to travel regularlyThis isn't that far from my grasp. I often have the luxury of long periods of time off (okay... it's unemployment), but I seldom have the funds to travel. But last year I did some backpacking through Europe & stayed in hostels... This isn't the sort of travel 19 year old me envisioned for herself. This was cheap, sometimes gross, occasionally scary travel. I saw some really amazing things, but I'm too damn old (and curmudgeonly) to share a room & bathroom with strangers. Hell no. Never again.
- •A dogI don't know why I wanted a dog. Probably because my parents had an adorable pug, and I missed her. But I don't now have, nor have I ever had, the discipline to train a dog, or walk it, or generally keep it active. I have a cat. The same cat I had when I made this list, in fact. A cat suits me: she's low maintenance, she's occasionally affectionate, she doesn't usually greet me at the door so there's little chance of tripping over her, and I don't have to express her anal glands. She's great!
- •A husbandThis sort of thing is ridiculous to put on a list because it's dependent on another person. You can't just say, "I want a husband" and make it happen. (I mean, I guess there's the whole mail order spouse route, but really? No. And that's certainly not what I was thinking). Also I've come to not want to get married. I would like to have a life partner. The Clyde to my Bonnie, but I don't need him to put a ring on it, just to be down to take a few dozen bullets for me if it came down to it.
- •A place in New York CityThis makes the house item on here seem even more ridiculous. When you're a teen in Connecticut New York is the most accessible city for you. It's just a 90 minute ride on the metro-north, and it's completely different. I love New York. I love the hustle and bustle of it, its smells, its people with their no bullshit attitudes. But I hate the snow, and the cold, and the lack of nature. I live in Los Angeles, and I love this city! New York is a great place to visit, but I can't live there.
- •LasikEven at 19 I had shitty vision. I used to wear contacts, but I've been rocking just the glasses for the last two years. I guess at 19 I was more adventurous because now the idea of lasers near my eyes is freakin' terrifying! Scratching my cornea: nope! Not into that! Keep your scientific advances, and potential blindness away from me! If glasses were fine for Benny Franklin then they're fine for me!
- •An M.D.Hahahahha - idiot! Dumb younger self! You only thought you'd pursue this because you loved "ER" and had a crush on Noah Wyle, and wanted to meet a hot doctor/be a hot doctor. Blood makes me queasy. I must've forgotten this when I scribbled this down. I do enjoy anatomy, biology, and genetics: they're fascinating. But besides not liking blood, I'm a bit of a germaphobe, and I'm not a big fan of physical human contact so this would've never worked out. Still looking for a hot doctor though! Always