WHAT THEY'RE REALLY THINKING: WHEN A GUY CATCALLS
I often wonder what the hell a guy is thinking when he catcalls. What does he really think will come of that... Seriously. These are a few I've personally heard, or been told of recently, what the lady was doing, and what I hypothesize the guy was thinking when he yelled. Please add your own, I know, unfortunately, all women have heard 1 or 3748.
- •You just made my day!WHAT SHE WAS DOING: bending over at the grocery store and looking to the back of the shelf for the last bottle of tabasco. WHAT HE WAS THINKING: Thank you! It's so good to see someone putting in extra effort to retrieve their own condiments! If only more people would do that. And not just with condiments, but everything. Look, people! I'm so damn tired of getting called over the PA at the depot to grab a screw some damn person was standing two damn inches from. This woman is model consumer!
- •You're so cute! ... hey... Hey... HEEEYYYYYWHAT SHE WAS DOING: crossing a street to get to the mechanic WHAT HE WAS THINKING: oh that's is an adorbs blouse! I wonder where she got it! Charlene would love that. Let me ask. Oh shoot, she must not've heard me. What does that guy do in "Hot Rod..." Baaabbbeeeee. Hahaha. But that's too forward, she seems fun, let's see if she gets it... She's not turning. Dang it! Guess I'll just have to google "floral pink top..." Oh forget it, I just won't mention this to Char.
- •You look like you could use some dick!WHAT SHE WAS DOING: picking berries in her yard in Portland WHAT HE WAS THINKING: Ho-Ly Shit! That woman has a ton of berry bushels! I bet she could use some help, I'll ask her. Dick in for the assist. Swoosh. ALTERNATE: Goddamn, that woman seems to be having a lovely time, but I bet giving a blow job would make her day even better. If I know nothing else, I know: Women. Love. Dick. I bet if I offer she'll hop in my car and get to. Make both our days! Daaaammmmnnnn
- •"My life is devoid of meaningful connections. My wife hates me because I'm a terrible person. My kids haven't spoken to me in years. My job sucks. I'm broke. But at least I still have this little bit of power: I can creep someone out and maybe even frighten them. So I'm still a man."Disclaimer: I've never been cat called. I've never cat called. I've never even seen someone cat called. I have no idea what I'm talking about here.Suggested by @gwcoffey