5 random photos from my phone, with a backstory

I closed my eyes, scrolled, and tapped. This should be less interesting than I thought it would...
  1. A photo from a trip to Santa Monica. Let's just say I was with some fungi(s).
  2. Uhm this is awkward... A pole used as a door stop at my college's dining hall. I swear this was for class, y'all.
  3. I got $15 dollars in my state tax returns... happiest day of my life.
  4. This fuckin squirrel stole my mothafuckin muffin.
  5. In lecture, sitting in the fisrt row, I got distracted by this beautiful pencil shaving. And proceeded to stealthily photograph my masterpiece.