When fortune cookies get too personal.

I like the little fortunes. So vague and applicable to any day's various situations...for the most part...
  1. Why ya gotta get in my headspace, cookie. Now I'm going nuts thinking how I'm gonna knock my next thought outta the park. And if I get a triple and they can't bat me in who's fault is that?
  2. Oh I tried to meet this one half way. Woke up at FIVE every day. Gave FIVE dollars to every panhandler I met. Ah, but FIVE meals a day was a bad choice. No luck working that off yet.
  3. ...and now I need a lawyer.
  4. Got both of these with the same dish. It's just too much reassurance for one meal.