5 Examples That Prove Meghan Trainor's Stylists Hate Her
M. Trainor's stylists have been dressing the boppy popstar poorly since her debut in 2014. Why? They are actually old white (probably republican) men in disguise who despise Trainor because of her body positive/feminist lyrics and ideals. Their hatred shows through Trainor's music video wardrobe. Here is the evidence:
- •They put her in this pastel mishmosh for her first music video, "All About That Bass"The men gathered and began plotting. "If we can't button her lips, lets button her shirt!" And so they did, first with a button down blouse (buttoned completely to the top) and then with a cardigan. The men established Meghan's image as a softer, bookish Lana Del Rey, unbeknownst to the men who Lana Del Rey even is.
- •The "stylists" then discovered the "quirky girl" trend two years too late via the SNL "Bein' Quirky" sketch, shown to them by Burt's grandson during the men's morning coffee meet up at Vince's house.I would have murdered an innocent man for this dress during my "quirky girl" phase in 2012. But "Lips Are Movin" debuted in 2014, and the men were WELL AWARE of the time gap. They knew people would sense a disconnect between modern day Trainor and her outdated apparel, causing a faint feeling of distrust amongst MTrain supporters.
- •"Dear Future Husband" dropped and the men were struggling to stay undercover."How dare she tell her "future husband" what to do?! After this song is released good luck finding any man who is ok with a wife who can't cook, TRAINOR!!!! That's iT! Put her in something that screams GOD DAMN AMERICA - red, white and LEOPARD PRINT - because THAT is what Trainor is preaching!! GOD DAMN the AMERICAN DREAM!! DAMN HARLOT!!!" Although I wasn't thinking "god damn America, god damn the American Dream," I was thinking, whoever put her in that tacky ensemble clearly dislikes this woman
- •And then Trainor had the audacity to write a song telling guys to step the F off titled, "No." That did not sit well with the old white men."Put her in a floor length jacket that makes her look like an alien. That will make the people hate her. She looks like she is not from this earth and therefore the public won't be able to trust her. BUT put some glitter on her nips so we men have something nice to ogle at while we have to sit through the premiere of these satanic verses." Just like the men predicted, we couldn't trust a woman wearing a metallic longass sweatshirt - not because we think she's an alien, just because it's ugly AF.
- •"Me Too" drops. The men have given up on even listening to the lyrics."Just put her in something obnoxious like, oh I don't know...wait, just recycle my daughter's prom gown from 1987. The wife and I are trying to clean out the guest room closet. Blue sequins never sit well with the average stomach. Plus I read the 'high-low' trend is 'so totally out'," Phil says as he does air quotes, but only uses his pointer fingers.
- •So now you know. Who you thought was behind this unpleasant scam:
- •Have even more vile intent than you may have originally thought.
- •NEW EVIDENCE AS OF 7/19/2016On local radio station 92.9, the DJ explained after playing Trainor hit "Me Too", that Meghan stated the hardest thing about being on tour is the OUTFITS. HUH LOOKS LIKE SHE MIGHT BE ONTO SOMETHING....AND SO ARE WE, MEN!