My 100th List: Why This Lil' App Has Meant a Whole Lot to Me 🏀

Yes, hit my big 💯❗️ (Coincidentally, March Madness Listin' round one vs the ever amazing @TQ .)
  1. I've been listing for 6 months now.
    Not beta, baby!
  2. 12 months ago, TL;DR fuck cancer.
    Over the course of a year my 64 year old Dad went from normal to beyond fully disabled. Brain tumor -> biopsy -> hemmorage -> 2 months in an ICU 3 hours from home -> implanted brain fluid draining device -> stroke-like effects from hemorrhage -> 2 months inpatient he sort of recovers physically from that -> comes home for radiation and chemo -> got sicker/weak -> now is a semi-vegetable I share taking care of with my mom and brother while I'm not working full time.
  3. It has ruined so much for my family.
    At first I wrote and scrapped list after list of what I had lost, wanted to hold on to ways he changed. He forgot about our cat. He and I chose her. He was a huge cat lover. Now, he's sort of indifferent to her. It's all so wrong.
  4. Even before this, though, I lacked my former outlets for creativity and connection with people.
    When I started my 9-5 two years ago I gave up on my creative dreams. I know the answer was to do things after work but I never had the time/energy/resources/positive outlook. Plus, I hate writing with no audience or goal in sight.
  5. Writing lists, though, is a very manageable task.
    I can write lists anywhere. During lunch, in a waiting room, in an uber, laying in bed unable to sleep after cleaning up after my dad's messes in the night. The draft button is right there, there's no reason to feel pressured to finish what I start right away, if ever.
  6. One of my first few lists was "MY EMERGENCY TOOLKIT FOR EMOTIONAL UNPLEASANTRIES 🏩 "
  7. That list is basically coping skills for being bipolar and borderline. It is still my most popular post.
    Later on, I listed about all the meds I take, which people appreciated as well.
  8. The List App doesn't have any of my real "IRL" friends, so I felt free enough to write as I pleased here.
    There's a few people here I knew in college, but that's it. I removed the more obvious personal details in my profile but I'm always a lil' paranoid online.
  9. Point being, List App has been my short term outlet during a long, terrible time that isn't getting easier.
  10. You have given me a space to write that is fun when I need it, easy to fit into my 'lifestyle', and I have the ability to complete and feel some weird sense of creative accomplishment in 100 lists.
  11. So, even though some people here way less time have written far more, 100 #quality #content lists that I'm proud of is big for me!
    Lol cool content much quality
  12. So happy 💯 lists to me!
    And god damn I hope the future gets better. In the meantime, I'm just gonna write lists and sometimes pretend it's not happening. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯