IMMEDIATE POWERBALL PURCHASES 💰

  1. The Portland Trailblazers and move them to Seattle.
  2. Personal time with Bill Murray.
  3. An anteater so I can do this:
  4. Tempurpedic, bitch.
  5. Spirit Airlines so I can shut that shit down.
  6. A yacht which will be named "Seamobile Hotspot"
  7. I would pay all of the actors on The Big Bang Theory to leave that fucking show.
  8. All the LaCroix I can handle.
  9. A hand truck to carry all the LaCroix I can handle.
  10. Diabetic test strips because that shit is expensive for no reason.
  11. EPCOT just so I can rename it EXPERIMENTAL PROTOTYPE CUNT OF TOMORROW.
  12. Cookies!
  13. FUCK YOU, STUDENT LOANS I HAVE MONEY NOW BUT NOT FOR YOU HAHA