THINGS FROM MY CHILDHOOD THAT STILL UPSET ME

  1. THE FUCKING SILVER MONKEY PUZZLE ON LEGENDS OF THE HIDDEN TEMPLE WAS ONLY THREE PIECES YET EVERY GODDAMN KID ON THAT SHOW STRUGGLED SO BADLY.
  2. Wanted a Barbie for Christmas. Got Skipper instead.
  3. The Discovery Zone near my house closed before I could experience its whimsical magic as shown in the tv commercials.
  4. THE QUESTIONS ON DOUBLE DARE WEREN'T THAT DIFFICULT. C'MON PARENTS, GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER.
  5. Too many bowling birthday parties. Bowling isn't fun when you suck at it.
  6. A horse bit me.
  7. I lost my Smash Mouth CD.
  8. Stu, Lou, and Drew Pickles somehow all put up with Angelica's shit ARE YOU KIDDING ME NICKELODEON
  9. My Spanish teacher had an absurdly German last name. Didn't add up, you guys.