Ranked but subject to change without notice
  1. Stephen Colbert
    Static
    Swoon times a million
  2. Jon Stewart
    Static
    Forever & Always — only #2 because it's been so long since he last graced us with his wit.
  3. John Oliver
    Static
    The dream: we're best of friends that talk on the phone almost daily; he explains the news, I bore him with questions.
  4. Seth Meyers
    Static
    Swoon times half a million
  5. Trevor Noah
    Static
    Very funny, will get funnier with time
  6. Then everyone else
    Nothing against the Jimmys or Samantha Bee — all great, but not swoon-worthy