THINGS I EXPECT AT A WEDDING

  1. Alcohol
  2. Rice
  3. Mason jars
  4. Ritualistic chanting
  5. Sparklers
  6. Two people devoting their lives to each other blah blah blah...
  7. TONS of leftover dessert
  8. People realizing they should download the Uber app
  9. Relatives nobody knows
  10. That guy trying to let people know about the after party
  11. Socks