WHAT I DO WHILST WAITING IN THE EXAM ROOM

  1. Avoid touching Highlights magazine for fear of cooties
  2. Try to casually tie my gown in the back
  3. Try to sit like a lady in my gown
  4. Try not to get sad about rogue knee hair that I'm just now noticing
  5. Squinting to read the recruitment flyer for type two diabetes patients
  6. Wondering if I might have type two diabetes
  7. Thinking about how I smell like bacon