Some Weird Shit This One Guy Has to Said to Me

ALL OF THIS!!! IS OUT OF THE BLUE!!!
  1. You have the thighs to be a football player
    Uh????
  2. Just saw a car crash! Blood everywhere
    This is not how to start a conversation
  3. I have enough homework to occupy 14 Chinese orphans
    What
  4. Featuring my friend Kermit the Frog
    It was just his friend
  5. Maybe women in New England are so large because they need to hibernate from the cold
    ???????????????????????????????????