1. Lucien
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    We'd each dug in on names we didn't much like, but the baby was already 9 days overdue. So, there we were, at brunch out in Bushwick, chasing names, like people walking circles in the woods, getting excited at the possibility of some new landmark before realizing it was the same old oak tree. Hillary leaned back behind her massive belly. "I once knew a girl," she said slowly, "named Lucien. Everybody called her Lu. She was pretty cool." "Why the fuck didn't you mention that sooner?" I said.
  2. Lu
  3. Louie
  4. Little person
    Or, Little friend. And, kiddo, though maybe that's condescending?
  5. The kid
  6. That baby
    Actual exchange just now between mother and child: "I'm a baby." "Well, when you were a baby you were happy all the time so maybe you should try being happy?" "I'm a baby, I can't talk." When she was actually a baby, we called her Smush.
  7. Peanut
  8. Simon and Simon
    She's very blonde. In the same blondeness genre: Debbie Harry, Simon LeBon.
  9. Jethro Tull
    I have this odd and subterranean sense that my father, who has terrible taste in music and loves Jethro Tull, called me this. I have no other explanation.
  10. Bunny
    Poor Bunny when sick.
  11. Monkey
  12. Lucy
    This was her intended nickname, after Irene Dunne's character in "The Awful Truth," which is our favorite screwball comedy, or maybe more aptly our favorite female performance in a screwball comedy. She is glamorous, and progressive, and droll, and game, and without need. But while those qualities carried, it never quite fit her--Lucy.
  13. Little Monster
    Which is what she's being on this train ride.
  14. Are You From Space?
    "I'm not from space! I'm from Brooklyn!"
  15. Lucien Frey-Lotto
    When she's in trouble, which she currently is. (Also, Lucifer.)