1. I got offered my first promotion!
    My first full-time salaried job offer! With benefits!
  2. I turned down my first promotion!
    After initially accepting, I went home and WEPT at the idea of being tied down at a job I wasn't excited about. Went in the next day and changed my answer.
  3. I moved across country!
    I drove to LA with all my things in the back of my car! The humble start of all great artists (and ignominious wretches)!
  4. I wrote my first spec scripts and joined my first writing group!
  5. I got my first apartment!
  6. I worked my first red carpet!
    Sharknado 3 premiere! Lou Ferrigno called me a doll! It was weird!
  7. I did my first paid comedy gig/business trip!
  8. I had my first marriage proposal!
    An old friend texted me out of the blue offering to split his military housing allowance with me when he moves! That can only happen if you're married.
  9. I turned down my first marriage proposal!
    Call me old-fashioned, but I could never accept a man via text.
  10. I got fired for the first time!
    I worked for a swanky Santa Monica tutoring company for a few months! I was less communicative than they wanted me to be (failed to respond to a voicemail within 24 hours), so they fired me via email! TELL ME WHICH IS THE REAL FAILURE IN COMMUNICATION.
  11. I got a sick pixie cut that I'd been wanting to get for years!
    Thanks for reminding me @sophiack