GUYS YOU PROBABLY SHOULD NOT SLEEP WITH
A compilation of mistakes, close calls and warnings.
- •The guy that makes you have sex on the living room floor because his roommate is sleepingAnd then drives you home in his pizza delivery truck
- •The guy that's sleeps at your house for a month one summer because he is "between" placesIt his defense it was really nice to have someone to binge watch CSI marathons on cable tv with.
- •The guy who won't accept your friend request after you sleep with him.This is why I think all guys from USC are douche bags.
- •The guy who hesitates when you ask to sleep over when you spent the whole day drinkingHELLO DUI'S are expensive!
- •The guy who gets so drunk at a concert, that you brought him to, that he sleeps the entire car ride home and tries to pee in your carportAnd then makes you drive him to work the next day because he doesn't own a car.
- •The guy who won't leave your dorm room till you call his friend who literally has to drag him out the next morning
- •The guy that makes you drive his ass home at 7am despite the fact you were up partying till 3amAnd it's freezing outside, okay well not freezing but really cold for LA.
- •Frat guys.In general. Period. No exceptions.
- •The guy who suddenly really needs to go workout/study/do something really important right after hooking up with you.But he was super hot so I still don't know if I regret it.
- •Your weed dealer.It makes it really hard to get a dub after you decide you don't want to sleep with him anymore.
- •The guy who lives upstairs.I was somehow the only girl in my house that managed to avoid this and damn I was thankful. Ceilings are as thin as walls!
- •The guy who NEEDS a cigarette IMMEDIATELY after sex.Like seriously can't you wait 10 minutes?
- •You ex-boyfriends brothers best friend.Who has an ex-wife and kids and PTSD from being in Iraq. And your ex is definitely going to find out. But wasn't that the point?
- •Your BFFMale. Female. Doesn't matter. It gets messy. Trust me.