NOT MY MOST GLORIOUS MOMENTS

guys I'm kind of an idiot
  1. the time I spent 150 $ in one weekend to go out
  2. the time I was so drunk I was on the verge of passing out and spoke only Spanish to my very worried non-Spanish speaking ex
  3. the time I thought I was texting my ex about a guy we both hated when I was rly texting that guy
  4. the time I was so tired of people's shit that I responded 'okay?' when a customer said 'there's no caramel drizzle on my drink...'
  5. the time I brought my entire handbag to the beach in Spain
    if you know anything you can imagine how badly that ended
  6. the time I pulled my friend's lipstick out of a bar toilet bowl and forgot to wash my hands
  7. the time I had nudes saved on my phone and iCloud sharing was to my misfortune very much turned on
  8. the time I took a drink from a guy who likes me and immediately turned around to make out with a random guy, drink in hand
    im being a coward and pretending I blacked out that night
  9. the time I tried telling three male cops that my friend was just tired and napping (as he was clearly passed out drunk) and was told that if another lie came out of my mouth I was going to jail
  10. the time I thought turning left on red was a thing
    ok this was before I got my licence but still
  11. the time I spaced out in the middle of an intersection turning left and got stuck in the middle and listened to everyone honk at me for like 7 minutes
  12. I'm like 140% sure there's more but I can't think of them right now