1. THIS!! Need I say more?
    Is that tattoo spelled correctly?
  2. Their bathroom habits... "I'll be back taking the Browns to the Super Bowl"
    Really? Just go take a shit oh and please use the shit spray.
  3. Ew their bedroom habits ... "so my boyfriend (of 2 mths who I met on Tinder) wants my best friend to ya know like BE with us"
    So many things here...where to begin? EWW BLEACH for my ears PLEASE! Tinder? 2 months? BE? Yes I get it no need for emphasis.
  4. MoNOgomy? "So I hate my husband, he no like to touch me, so I go find me a man who love to touch this"
    Dear Mother of God you are 53 years old and your new MAN will vote for the 1st time this upcoming elections. GROSS just GROSS!
  5. Medical History (unless it contagious, if so, then let a bitch know) Gout, Gall bladder , blood pressure and all ailments in between.
    I'm 45 you're 25 my body has hurt 20 years longer than yours but I'm not complaining. Instead I'm wishing you well or to hell if you don't shut the fuck up.
  6. Lifestyle and Fitness: "so my boyfriend and I are getting back on track with our work outs and trying some really great no carb, no gluten or trans fat recipes"
    Really? Are you training with kangaroos? Roll that belly up and shove it back in your spanx, you're scaring the children. Oh and wipe your face you've got chocolate caked in the corners of your mouth and your breath smells like a bakery. No trans fats my ass.