Reasons why grocery shopping online is justified

  1. I can resist the yearning for bad-for-you food
    I can justify lusting after Magnum Bars. Not actually buying them...which I just did.
  2. Not seeing the "10 for 10, 11th item free" signs
    I would never buy half of that crap
  3. My time is worth more than $4.95 an hour
    I try to tell myself this even though at home I would be binge watching something on Netflix.
  4. The shoppers are better than me...
    One person told me their training included a whole section about investigating produce. I thought I was doing an okay job until a cashier took some Halos from me and said, "you don't want to buy these..."
  5. Excuse me while I unpack groceries and eat a Magnum bar. It's my treat for going to the store.
  6. Dammit! I forgot the lunchmeat