1. 9 noises I make when pretending to listen to people
  2. 6 regrets I think about daily which make me clench my bum cheeks together
  3. 14 brilliant app ideas I had that have already made someone else a millionaire
  4. 5 knackered puffins that look like Lionel Richie
  5. 0 occasions when it's ok to describe stuff as gay
  6. 13 compound swears that are fuck-wanking-ly brilliant
  7. 7 documentaries that I claim are my favourites to sound cultured
  8. 6 ways to save money by making your own antibiotics
  9. 3 shoes worn by the illuminati
  10. 7 breeds of dog I'd sleep with if they were people