AN OPEN LETTER TO THE PERSON ON THIS CAMPUS IN CHARGE OF SPOONS

  1. SOMEONE took the utensil dispensers out of the student center
  2. I am a student. I have taken out thousands of dollars worth of loans to be sitting in this student center. I just want to eat my yogurt.
  3. I beep bopped over to where the utensil dispenser has been for the last year and it was gone.
    GONE.
  4. So I shimmied on over to Panera.
    NO SPOONS.
  5. Finally I went to the new place on the lower level and asked the lady for a spoon. She gave me one but then she said, "this is a one time thing. Never again." WHAT. It's a plastic spoon!!! It's not even anything fancy like a knife!!
  6. I am hurt. I am upset. I am annoyed.
  7. It is 2017, spoons should not be this hard to come by.