You can read part 1 here: HEADLINES I WOULD LIKE TO BE ABOUT ME or don't, it's up to you.
  1. Local Woman Wins Lifetime Supply of Carrots
  2. College Student Recites All Seven "Harry Potter" Books from Memory
  3. Meet the First Person to Live in The Wizarding World of Harry Potter
  4. Girl Elected "Queen of Squirrels" by Local Squirrel Population
  5. College Student Pens Strongly Worded Letter to the President about the Pronunciation of the Word 'Crayon'