I'M NOT ALLOWED TO COOK DINNER ANYMORE

  1. My friend sent me a free week of Hello Fresh, one of those fancy dinner subscription services, to try out this past week.
  2. All the ingredients come in little boxes with labels so you know what goes to which recipe. The recipes are a step-by-step, super easy to follow, almost impossible to fuck up kind of deal.
    Cut vegetables. Measure out oil. Place chicken in pan. It's all very straight forward.
  3. See here's the thing,
  4. Cooking is hard.
    There's a lot of chopping and mixing and cooking. It's not like on the Food Network where things just come together while you chat about your favorite kind of tablecloth. This shit is complicated.
  5. Apparently I have absolutely no cooking abilities. In the short time I spent making this dinner I managed to start a small fire, overcook the orzo, and essentially ruin the entire meal.
  6. You're probably like, "omg MacKenzie are you okay?? Fire is so scary. Did you obtain and injuries??"
    To which I say, "I'm doing okay. Fire IS scary. Thank you so much for your concern."
  7. Unless you're my sister. In that case you'd probably say something like, "WHY DID YOU USE THE BROILER?!"
    The broiler is a tricky thing. It just gets so hot, so fast. But the recipe said broil and I was following the recipe and the broiler can be used to great success.
  8. If you remember that you're using it.
    Which is hard when you're trying to make orzo at the same time!!!
  9. So yeah, I started a small fire in the oven. And then possibly blinded myself with the smoke when I opened the oven. And while all that was happening I may have overcooked the orzo and ruined dinner.
  10. Maybe.
  11. A whole lot of maybes.
  12. My sister then declared that I am no longer allowed to make dinner.
    And I've earned a lifelong ban from the broiler.