BOOKS I LOVE BUT WILL NEVER READ AGAIN
Life is too short. @sophia sorry this got so morbid
- •Cum for BigfootLa petite mort. I didn't need to experience the pleasure twice. Fun fact: this was a huge bestseller that's been taken down by Amazon due to its "immoral content."
- •The Middlesteins by Jami AttenburgShe really "gets" suburbia and the modern American family. But, being from a family of depressed Jews, I don't want to ruminate too much over a possible death by Chinese food scenario.
- •Zuleika Dobson by Max Beerbohm"Death cancels all engagements," utters the first casualty
- •The Love Affairs of Nathaniel P. by Adelle WaldmanToo real. I have dated this literary man-child so many times. If you don't want to read the book because the end is probably nigh, please see this brilliant and condensed explanation of said man-child in the The New Inquiry's perfect response to Tikkun's ridiculously sexist Theory of the Young-Girl. http://bit.ly/1CXmJ50
- •Ancillary Justice by Anne LeckieI had to read half the sentences twice. I won't live long enough to circle that planet again.
- •Infinite Jest by David Foster WallaceSo many digressions. So postmodern. So much work. No death joke.
- •The Abortion by Richard BrautiganCan't the title say it all?
- •Killing Yourself to Live by Chuck KlostermanCan't the title say enough?
- •In Cold Blood by Truman CapoteCan't the title remove the images from my head before I go?
- •Roots by Alex HaleyEvery moment of my all-too-brief life is too precious to waste on ten generations of the most oppressed family for a second time. Plus my eyes will dry up and fall out from the crying.
- •Among Others by Jo WaltonEvery sci fi reference from my teenage years before I felt the kiss of the afterlife.
- •Super Sad True Love Story by Gary ShteyngartI am terrified of technology and mortality and whiny men. Don't need to relive the fear twice.
- •The Thirteenth Tale by Diane SetterfieldMysterious literary recluses mean I can die happy before I can read this again.
- •The Powerbroker by Robert CaroJust too long. But, I will read a thousand page fantasy novel four times (and counting) before I kick the bucket.
- •Selections from HerodotusDead people who did so many interesting things and so many dull ones.
- •Speedboat by Renata AdlerI'm too close to the grave to read too deeply about myself.
- •Anna Karenina by TolstoyI'm too close to the grave to read too deeply about my future.
- •The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty by A.N. RoquelaureI can die happy having read this, Anne Rice's pseudonymous erotic fairytale. Too weird to subject myself to again.