How to Be a Voluntourist

  1. 1.
    Be white
  2. 2.
    Make a GoFund Me page
    Explain in detail how your five-day trip to "Africa" will change your life, but only with the monetary donations of your mom's friends on Facebook. (John 3:16 or something like that)
  3. 3.
    Pack only Patagonia, Camelback water bottles, and Teva sandals.
    Name brands are a must when traveling to a remote village in Zimbabwe.
  4. 4.
    Upon arrival in "Africa" (you can't remember the name of the country), take lots of photos of "natives."
    Ideally these are take on your Canon 5D Mark II, which you justified purchasing solely for this trip with your mom's credit card.
  5. 5.
    Take a selfie with a native in native garb.
  6. 6.
    Take a selfie of you in native garb with a native in native garb.
    *set as cover photo*
  7. 7.
    Find a minimum of 10 native children and take a photo with each of them.
    Note: It must only be you in the photo and it's even more ideal if your Patagonia rain jacket logo is showing.
  8. 8.
    Post all of these photos on Facebook with the 3G wifi you complain about in your hotel room.
  9. 9.
    Instagram a picture of you and one of the children, whose names you have all forgotten.
    Add a caption like, "Traveling to Africa was life changing! #blessed"
  10. 10.
    Have all of your friends pick you up at the airport with balloons and a poster board sign, with your name scrawled across it in bubble letters.
    Never let this trip down. Talk about it at your wedding. Talk about it at your child's birth. Talk about it at your own child's wedding. Have someone else talk about it at your funeral.
  11. 11.
    #tbt all these new pictures of you and the people you "helped" for the next 10 weeks
    Suggested by   @daniel