I went to a ball at Oxford and my guess is that it will probably be my last.
  1. Drunk people in white tie
  2. Drunk people in ball gowns
  3. Old, white, male donors dancing with innocent, foreign PhD students.
  4. Pies
  5. Lots of champagne
  6. Olympic rowers
  7. Tall men
  8. Piles of locally-made cheese
  9. Members of the notorious dining club, the Bullingdon Club, being obnoxious and notorious.
  10. People who voted for David Cameron.