AWKWARD ELEVATOR DIALOGUE FANTASY RESPONSES

If you're like me, there's nothing worse than random strangers holding you hostage with small talk while you are forced to give up personal space for a moment, trapped as you both are in a small metal box. I deal by fantasizing about the perfect response to shut that shit down, taking inspiration from Hollywood.
  1. "Do I look like a fucking bellboy to you?"
    Responding to: "Can you press 4 for me please?"
  2. "The fuck are you to tell me what kind of goddamn morning it is? "
    Response to: "Good Morning!"
  3. "What are you a fucking weatherman now?"
    Response to: "Beautiful weather we're having!"
  4. 🎶"The weather outside is weather."🎶
    Alternate response to: "Beautiful weather we're having!"
  5. No! I'm not Buddha so Don't touch my belly!
    I'm not pregnant nor have I ever been but being in an elevator AND having someone touch my preggars belly seems like an anxiety nightmare!
    Suggested by   @kate81