CHILDHOOD MEMORIES OF WHICH I HAVE PHOTOGRAPHIC PROOF
Sometimes I remember stuff then realize it was a dream. This is more fun anyway. I was so cute. All of these photos were on my phone because I believe in owning one's blackmail.
- •I had a short-lived child modeling career as the cover girl for a Mr. Rogers lesson plan book.The photographer got really frustrated with me because I couldn't get my hand flat enough. This is also my go-to "interesting fact about me" in forced group settings.
- •My favorite outfit was a pink Powerpuff Girls shirt and houndstooth spandex pants.I would stretch the pants over my feet like weird hooves and run around and pretend I was a spy. Also, glasses.
- •My mom didn't believe in sugar anything so my brother and I downed anything sweet if it presented itself.Good for health, bad for avoiding men in sketchy vans. Also, look how glam my mother is.
- •We had this side alley with a plastic house. It was my EVERYTHING.
- •I danced. This photo shoot scarred me.But that dress, oh, that dress. I called it my "computer dress" and put it on whenever I played computer games.
- •CHRISTMAS IS THE SHITAlways has been and will be my favorite holiday.
- •I can't say I remember this.Looks like fun, though. Thanks for the ride, broski