I have entertained this notion on and off for most of my life, and this is what I have this week
  1. Get your shit organized
    Disassemble that drawer that's like the Ecto Containment Unit from Ghostbusters and start making piles. Like, 'Last Year's Stuff' and 'Papers With My Social Secuirty Number On it'
  2. Answer phone calls. EVEN IF it's a number you don't recognize
    When you realize it is someone who will never, ever get your money, hang up on them or pretend that you just died
  3. Do not blow all of the money you made that day on rosé and scratch tickets
    Only spend like half-.75
  4. Buy shit at the grocery store, 'make' 'dinner'
    Bagel bites from the box to the oven counts. If you have never turned on your oven or do not know how to then consider calling a friend, roommate or your high school guidance counselor for help
  5. Look at a calendar. Really look at it
    There are sooooo many months coming up