HISTORICAL FIGURES, BOTH DEAD AND ALIVE, THAT I HAVE A CRUSH ON

  1. Teddy Roosevelt
    1. The man was majestic as fuck 2. He loved his wife (wives) SO MUCH 3. Excellent taste in architecture (hello sagamore hill) 4. I literally have a job because of him lol
  2. Justin Trudeau
    ... Does this need an explanation??? I didn't think so
  3. Aaron Burr
    I don't think this was the expected outcome of Hamilton but this dude was trying to pass feminist legislature in the fucking 19th century and THEYRE STILL NOT DOING IT TODAY SO YES I LOVE YOU AARON BURR
  4. William Wadley
    This man rebuilt the Central of Georgia railroad after the civil war (when it lost 90% of its tracks and rolling stock, THANKS SHERMAN) and then had the fucking foresight to buy a port AND a steamship company. He created the fourth largest port in the country y'all!!!!
  5. Joe Biden
    He is an unhinged crazy person but like JOE
  6. Cory Booker
    Jersey/Bergen county boy who is literally superman. Listen to him on last week's wait wait don't tell me and then try and tell me your heart doesn't squeal out of joy.