THINGS EVERYONE LIES ABOUT

  1. "I've honestly never picked my nose"
    If you say you've never picked your nose I will call you a dirty fucking liar right in front of your grandma
  2. "I don't take screen shots of texts/tinder/snapchat"
    Right, and I don't blame how offensive strangers find me on my New Jersey upbringing.
  3. "I don't see the point of the dollar store"
    If you don't love balling out at the dollar store, I really don't see a point in you consuming oxygen.
  4. "I'm not a good liar"
    Step one in being a good liar: convince everyone you suck at lying.
  5. "I drink enough water!!"
    This was a constant disagreement between myself, my roommate, and her insistence that her body didn't need more than 24 oz of water a day.
  6. "I can go one more day without washing my hair"
    I can't, but I will.
  7. The amount of times per week "Baby Got Back" get stuck in their head.
    I'm putting this on here because I really, really hope this isn't just me.
  8. How much they enjoy Justin Beiber's music
    I hate him as a human being (HOW FUCKING DARE YOU ABANDON A MONKEY IN GERMANY YOU MONSTER) but don't lie about how catchy "what do you mean" or "beauty and a beat" is
  9. Laughing at their own jokes
    Literally 80% of the things I find amusing are things that I have said/tweeted
  10. I don't want any, I'm too full
    We all want the dessert, no matter how uncomfortable inside we feel. However we don't want to be judged from the inlaws or that date that made the remark "wow you actually ate all of that"
    Suggested by   @bekah