Anxieties I Have the Days Before My 21st Birthday

I turn 21 this Friday, and the excitement is decidedly dim because I'm the youngest of my friend group. Here's what I'm thinking about:
  1. so many people are out of town or can't come to my birthday dinner 😟
    It's not a reflection on our friendship it's not a reflection on our friendship it's not a ref-
  2. [beta redacted]
  3. is 21 the cut off year for my youth to be endearing and innocent? have i squandered too many teenage opportunities? did I blow by the chance to email thank yous or questions to all the writers/editors/adults I admire and still sound earnest and casual without it seeming like I'm hankering for a job? should I send all those emails TONIGHT?
  4. ending on a positive: the past 21 years, being the youngest of friends sucked because crossing age-milestones felt tired by the time I got there. but now begins the rest of my life where it doesn't matter wheeeeee!!!