A DO NOT Gift Guide for any Holiday Season

...Because sometimes gifts for your kids can be hazardous to your own mental health. Read the list below and watch the Mom Cam in the Minivan about it at http://www.mallofamanda.com/blog/2016/12/14/the-four-gifts-to-avoid-giving-this-season
  1. Monopoly: Hell hath no fury like a 7-year-old Monopoly-player scorned... except from the mother who has had to be the Banker in the same damn game that's lasted 8 months.
  2. Hungry Hungry Hippo: I always begged for this gift for Hanukkah when I was little and wondered why my parents never gave it to me. So I decided to get it for my own kids. Loudest gift ever. To make matters worse… We have two, so now I have to listen to this game in Surround Sound.
  3. Pet Betta Fish: Nothing is worse than cleaning up fish water… Other than cleaning up dead fish water... all over the carpet.
  4. Yo-yo's: My children have the unique talent of being able to weaponize any object in our house, and the yo-yo just begs to be turned into a death and destruction machine.