Points of Discussion to Have With Your Spouse Prior to Having Kids

  1. Who gets first dibs on blaming their own fart smells on the baby
    Side note: You may want to divvy up ownership of locations as well (i.e. Airplanes, restaurants, the checkout line at Trader Joe's)
  2. Which of you will wipe your child's tush when they're still asking at age 6
  3. Whether or not to sign your kids up for sports teams that travel for games
  4. Establish "the look" you'll give each other, when it's time to make up a collective lie to your children, so you can avoid certain activities.
  5. What age it's appropriate to give your kids gum for the first time, so they STFU for at least a few minutes while chewing.
  6. Liquor before beer or beer before liquor? Which one should be your child's first taste of alcohol?