Weapons of Mass Dysfunction

We don't own guns but we do protect ourselves.
  1. Conch shell: A two in one device... Warning sound and organic "brass" knuckles
  2. Metal baseball bat under bed
  3. Various car, house and miscellaneous keys AKA The Wolverine
    Strategically place between fingers while walking to car late at night
  4. The iPhone
    "9-1" dialed while husband gets babysitter cash from ATM. I await safely in locked minivan as onlooker ready to tap the final "1" and hit send.
  5. Craziness
    If left without any weapons I've vowed to just use craziness. Maybe if I pee on myself the would be attacker will be scared away or at least distracted enough so I can run.
  6. My hands
    I haven't tried this or needed to use my hands as weapons since I was 12. But when I was cornered by another kid who threatened violence, the windmill approach worked wonders.