MY HYPOTHETICAL BACHELOR INTERVIEW

  1. "are you ready to fall in love?"
    oh hell yeah.
  2. "are you willing take a risk?"
    i'll say yes to this vague question--sure! what'd you have in mind? you mean like, opening up to a person and letting them shatter your whole being if it doesn't end up working ou--
  3. "nah, none of that. more along the lines of, would you be willing to fly in a small plane?"
    oh hell NO.
  4. "what about participating in athletic competitions on group dates?"
    not really a sports girl, guys.
  5. "okay...singing? that will be broadcast on national tv?"
    r u kidding
  6. "rappeling off a skyscraper?"
    ...is that even a thing?
  7. "bungee jumping??"
    what do you think?
  8. "fine, what exactly WOULD you do on an ideal date?"
    maybe go to a rad concert and eat some delicious foo--
  9. "oh, we don't actually let you eat on the dates. and the only concerts you get are awkward private ones by singer/songwriters that only have one song you've heard of from a hallmark commercial."
    ....oh.
  10. "look, don't you want to fall in love??"
    well yeah, but are extreme sports and embarassment like requi--
  11. "we'll call you. thanks."